Deuteronomy 28:13-15 If you listen to these commands of the LORD your God that I am giving you today, and if you carefully obey them, the LORD will make you the head and not the tail, and you will always be on top and never at the bottom. You must not turn away from any of the commands I am giving you today, nor follow after other gods and worship them. But if you refuse to listen to the LORD your God and do not obey all the commands and decrees I am giving you today, all these curses will come and overwhelm you…
Joshua 1:7-8 Be strong and very courageous. Be careful to obey all the instructions Moses gave you. Do not deviate from them, turning either to the right or to the left. Then you will be successful in everything you do. Study this Book of Instruction continually. Meditate on it day and night so you will be sure to obey everything written in it. Only then will you prosper and succeed in all you do.
Judges 2:11-15 The Israelites did evil in the LORD’s sight and served the images of Baal. They abandoned the LORD, the God of their ancestors, who had brought them out of Egypt. They went after other gods, worshiping the gods of the people around them and they angered the LORD. They abandoned the LORD to serve Baal and the images of Ashtoreth. This made the LORD burn with anger against Israel, so he handed them over to raiders who stole their possessions. He turned them over to the their enemies all around, and they were no longer able to resist them.
1 Samuel 15:22-23 But Samuel replied, “What is more pleasing to the LORD: your burnt offerings and sacrifices or your obedience to his voice? Listen! Obedience is better than offering the fat of the rams. Rebellion is as sinful as witchcraft, and stubbornness as bad as worshiping idols. So because you have rejected the command of the LORD, he has rejected you as king.”
2 Kings 17:7, 12-13 This disaster came upon the people of Israel because they worshiped other gods. They sinned against the LORD their God, who had brought them safely out of Egypt and had rescued them from the power of Pharaoh, the king of Egypt. Yes, they worshiped idols, despite the LORD’s specific and repeated warnings. Again and again the LORD had sent his prophets and seers to warn both Israel and Judah: “Turn from all your evil ways. Obey my commands and decrees–the entire law that I commanded your ancestors to obey, and that I gave you through my servants the prophets.”
Proverbs 1:24-25 “I called you so often, but you wouldn’t come. I reached out to you, but you paid no attention. You ignored my advice and rejected the correction I offered.
Proverbs 19:3, 16, 23 People ruin their lives by their own foolishness and then are angry at the LORD. . . Keep the commandments and keep your life; despising them leads to death. . . .Fear of the LORD leads to life, bringing security and protection from harm.
Isaiah 1:18-19 “Come now, let’s settle this,” says the LORD. “Though your sins are like scarlet, I will make them as white as snow. Though they are red like crimson, I will make them as white as wool. If you will only obey me, you will have plenty to eat.
Isaiah 59:1-2 Listen! The LORD’s arm is not too weak to save you, nor is his ear too deaf to hear you call. It’s your sins that have cut you off from God. Because of your sins, he has turned away and will not listen anymore.
Jeremiah 7:23 This is what I told them: ‘Obey me, and I will be your God, and you will be my people. Do everything as I say, and all will be well!’
Ezekiel 18:28, 30 They will live because they thought it over and decided to turn from their sins. Such people will not die. . . “Therefore, I will judge each of you, O people of Israel, according to your actions, says the Sovereign LORD. Repent, and turn from your sins. Don’t let them destroy you! Repent, and turn from your sins. Don’t let them destroy! Put all your rebellion behind you, and find yourselves a new heart and a new spirit. For why should you die, O people of Israel?
Matthew 7:26-27 But anyone who hears my teaching and doesn’t obey it is foolish, like a person who builds a house on sand.
John 3:36 And anyone who believes in God’s Son has eternal life. Anyone who d0esn’t obey the Son will never experience eternal life but remains under God’s angry judgment
Acts 5:29-32 But Peter and the apostles replied, “We must obey God rather than any human authority. The God of our ancestors raised Jesus from the dead after you killed hi by hanging him on a cross. The God put him in the place of honor at his right hand as Prince and Savior. He did this so the people of Israel would repent of their sins and be forgiven.
Romans 2:8-9 But he will pour out his anger and wrath on those who live for themselves, who refuse to obey the truth and instead live lives of wickedness. There will be trouble and calamity for everyone who keeps on doing what is evil–for the Jew first and also for the Gentile.
Romans 6:20-21 When you were slaves to sin, you were free from the obligation to do right. And what was the result? You are now ashamed of the things you used to do, things that end in eternal doom.
Human beings are pretty selfish beings, initially crying their frustration, hunger, and discomfort, and getting accustomed to having their needs met, and the frustrations relieved. With caring, giving people the babies receive what they need–dry diapers over clean genitalia, if a reddened area a protective, healing ointment applied; given food in loving arms, encouraging words to show and express love, food, both nutritional and emotional giving the child needs.
As the infants grow and develop. they learn different methods of getting their wants known. As infants, babies cry to have needs met. If the caretaker does not answer those needs regularly and with sincere care, the infant can develop a syndrome called “failure to thrive” and the baby learns not to interact with others. It is sad to see–the eyes are blank, there is no interest shown to surroundings, not glances with another person–no smiles, no following a colorful mobile–just an emptiness.
But a child who has been shown love, encouragement, direction, guidance and interaction with others–parents, grandparents, siblings, other children in social events those children usually blossom. However, along the way they have learned some manipulative ways to try and get what they want IMMEDIATELY. This is not necessarily a need being fulfilled, but a new toy, a new cereal or other food, or some other bauble they have spotted. Often times they have learned that crying, whining, screeching what they want in a piercing voice will have a caretaker capitulating–more out of embarrassment and harassment than wanting the child to have whatever, and certainly not fulfilling a need.
Score one for the child–a desire filled by screeching and being a brat; and more groundwork laid for the parents or caretakers to learn how to save themselves from embarrassing misbehavior by giving in to the whiny, crying misbehavior. The child quickly learns that this bad behavior gets him/her what is wanted–for the moment. It is the parents/caregivers/ who have to learn to teach methods of how to change this bad behavior. Until they recognize the child is being a misbehaving, manipulative young one, they cannot correct first, their behavior and rule setting, and then give the rules and expectations to the child with follow-through.
This is what God did while Adam and Eve lived within the Garden. ‘Enjoy all, BUT do NOT eat of this tree.’ And for a while they obeyed that, but with the help of Satan tempting, Eve tasted of the forbidden fruit and then shared with her husband. Feeding the first bit of sin, that underlying selfishness that humans are born with, and if circumstances are amicable, the selfishness and greater sins flourish. I imagine it is harder for children in Third World environments are able to fine tune selfishness and other sinful behaviors. Other higher level needs (Maslow’s hierarchy of needs) such as water, food, clothing must be met first, before more desires and wants should be met.
We are all capable of sin–lying to protect self from punishment when you and sibling have done something wrong and parents are honing in to dish out discipline, one sees a piece of ‘bling’ and covets it. Does it get picked up and pocketed, or is it left? Has one stopped, realizing one of God’s commands is to not covet and to not steal. Getting used to disobeying and sinning, then stuffing the convicting voice of the Holy Spirit down, makes continued sinning appealing. And then one gets pulled further, tempted with more sin, deeper, harming self and others. And then often, one is unable to ditch the sin and sinful ways, even without family and friends love and support. Oh, the desire might be there. But, too easy to follow the selfish desires, the sin(s), and often without God one is NOT able to break out of the slavery of the sins.
Having idols, other than only God is a sin. God demands that we are to only desire him and He will supply all our needs. Our selfish desires are idols we want–and we are commanded and repeatedly told that God demands our complete obedience, that we should only desire Him–no ‘bling’, no desire for lots of electronics, clothing, shoes, money, working too many hours, over-eating, sexual appetites, and so much more. These are other idols humans crave and desire.
Lord, even though I have been a sinner, still commit some and have the blessing of being able to repent and be forgiven, and yet, with all sins, You chose me. Thank You for guarding and guiding me and ‘mybellaviews.’
Rewards come with obedience, God’s word is clear on this. It is not a life without stress and difficulties. God’s Word promises He will be with us through all of life’s ups and downs.
Ezekiel 11:20 And I will give them singleness of heart and put a new spirit within them. I will take away their stony, stubborn heart and give them a tender, responsive heart so they will obey my decrees and regulations.
Ezekiel 36:26-27 And I will give you a new spirit in you. I will take out your stony, stubborn heart and give you a tender, responsive heart.
Matthew 6:10 May your Kingdom come soon, May your will be done on earth, as it is heaven.
Luke 23:34 Jesus said, “Father, forgive them, for they don’t know what they are doing.” . . .
John 6:44 “For no one can come to me unless the Father who sent me draws them to me, and at the last day I will raise them up. . . “
John 14:6 Jesus told him, “I am the way, the truth, and the life. No one can come to the Father except through me. . . .”
Romans 10:1 Dear brothers and sisters, the longing of my heart and my prayer to God is for the people of Israel to be saved.
2 Corinthians 4:4 Satan, who is the god of this world, has blinded the minds of those who don’t believe. They are unable to see the glorious light of the Good News. They don’t understand this message about the glory of Christ, who is the exact likeness of God.
Ephesians 6:19 And pray for me, too, Ask God to give me the right words so I can boldly explain God’s mysterious plan that the Good News is for Jews and Gentiles alike.
Colossians 4:2-3 Devote yourselves to prayer with an alert mind and a thankful heart. Pray for us, too, that God will give us many opportunities to speak about his mysterious plan concerting Christ.
1 Timothy 2:1 I urge you, first of all, to pray for all people. Ask God to help them; intercede on their behalf, and give thanks for them.
2 Peter 3:9 The Lord is not slow. . . but is patient toward you, not wishing that any should perish, but that all should reach repentance.
Believers need to pray for all to have an open heart, to listen to the gratitude, peace, and encouragement that believers have, and how they want that same peace, joy, and grace for others. We pray that they will see spiritual enlightenment from us. Many, not all the close non-believers I know in my life, tend to roll their eyes, clearly believing they are solely responsible for the accomplishments, pleasures, and rewards they see and have in their lives. Most of these people are some of the kindest, most generous and welcoming people I know. And I wonder how they can be so giving in all manner and yet their generosity is not from following the Lord, it is just intrinsic to who they are as people.
My kindness has been a growing process since Jesus chose me to follow Him, to learn more about who and what He is and who He lived. To seek the Holy Spirit, and allow his guidance, his ability to increase my knowledge, to encourage my growth, and to convict me when I am stubbornly not following the directives given. My benefits are so much heightened since God chose me. Initially, I did not follow fully. Mostly as I did not have a mentor, was not attending a biblical, active, and many class available facility. It took years before I found a church that fulfilled those needs. As a nurse I worked at least every other weekend, sometimes, more than two a month so attendance was sporadic, and I therefore was not joining classes and so forth.
My second husband was a Catholic; and although I was raised Catholic, I had left the church when I was 16, as it did not fill me with any special insight as to who God was/is, and who Jesus is. We o[ted to raise our combined family Catholic. And I must admit, my attitude was never good then. I felt like nothing connected to anything with the reading, with life and living, and you could attend and let your mind dwell into being a robot. ‘Stand up, kneel down, stand and sit.’
That was NOT my idea of religion, learning God’s word, what He wanted for our lives, so I began to delve further. I found a bible teaching church, and volunteered there is a couple positions. I began reading the bible, and listening to many TV preachers–not all of whom I liked, but there were several I did, and was able to learn and begin growing. I attended that church until 2014, but continued to volunteer every Monday, to count and input the funds, then take the money to the bank and deposit it. One Monday when I arrived, it was obvious the church was not open. I called one of my other volunteers; and he was so apologetic that no one had called to inform me and I had made the trip from North Topsail Beach to New Bern for nothing.
As I left the church, my cell phone rang, and I saw it was the Pastor of New Song. I pulled over and he explained what had happened. There had been a meeting of the different Methodist churches, and 6 years previous one of the things voted on was whether to marry gay folks. At the initial vote, it was 80-20 against, two years later, it was 60-40, and as of the meeting which had occurred the previous week, it was now 50-50. The pastor did not want to be told he had to go against the bible teaching of marrying same sex couples, and chose to put in his resignation, giving the hierarchy 2 months to find a new pastor. He also informed his staff–a worship pastor, a youth pastor, and a children’s pastor. They too put in their resignations.
They received a phone call to pack their offices, leave their keys on the desk as they were all without a job. As he relayed this, I was shocked. How are you insisting on something that God has strictly forbidden?
Obviously, for a coupe weeks, the church was in flux. But another bible-teaching, believing church stepped forward, fronted some money so it could be started to build another facility, and the Social Service Dept in town let them have office space, while the high school stepped forward to offer a meeting place each Sunday. God stepped up and in a way “rewarded” those pastors who said no to what the higher ups were beginning to push for.
During this time, I was attending the Gathering. Sigh of relief. I had two pastors who preached God’s Word without compromise or smoothing over sin. They called sin, sin, and taught in a manner I silently cheered.
But, still I wondered about those in my life who are non-believers. I do not want them to perish–especially since they are good, kind, generous, and loving people. They are in my daily prayers, and I pray believing God change the Irish hard-heads of some of them, and I thank Him that I believe He will save them, even if I don’t live to see it. I believe it will be done. I believe it for several reasons–God’s word promises to answer our prayers, God’s will is done if we pray for what He wants, God wants none to perish, and if we thank Him and believe it will come to be, it will.
But I am so thankful, I can suck up more biblical knowledge NOW because I believe, attend a couple of bible studies, have a majority of friendships with believers, and am motivated enough to indulge my questions and learning through my own reading, exploring, seeking the Holy Spirit’s guidance and enlightenment. Pastor Jordan said in a message a couple weeks ago about sometimes feeling as though he would give up his salvation. Paul said the same. I have said it in regards to these wonderful family members and friends who do not believe. But it is too great a gift and the penalty is too great to push it away. I will continue to pray, seek this resolution, that my loved ones will be saved.
Thank you, God for leading me and keeping a lamp lighting my feet to keep me on the path You have designated. Thank You for saving me and reassuring that many others in my life will also come to know You as Savior and the blessing You are to me and ‘mybellaviews.’
Deuteronomy 5:32 – 33 You shall be careful therefore to do as the LORD your God has commanded you. You shall not turn aside to the right hand or to the left. You shall walk in all the ways that the LORD your God has commanded you.
1 Samuel 15:22 And Samuel said, “Has the LORD as great delight in burnt offerings and sacrifices, as in obeying the voice of the LORD? Behold, is to obey is better than sacrifice and to listen than the fat of rams. . . “
Psalm 19:7 -8 The law of the LORD is perfect, converting the soul. . . The statutes of the LORD are right, rejoicing in the heart.
Psalm 119:1 – 5 Blessed are those whose way is blameless, who walk in the law of the LORD! Blessed are those who keep his testimonies, who seek him with their whole heart, who also do no wrong, but walk in his ways! You have commanded your precepts to be kept diligently. Oh that my ways may be steadfast in keeping your statutes!
Proverbs 3:1 – 2 “My son, do not forget my law, but let your heart keep my commands; for length of days and long life and peace they will add to you.”
Proverbs 4:4 Let your heart retain my words; keep my commands and live.
Proverbs 19:16 “He who keeps the commandment keeps his soul, but he who is careless of his ways will die.”
Matthew 16:24 Then Jesus told his disciples, “If anyone would come after me, let him deny himself and take up his cross and follow me.
Mark 1:17 And Jesus said to them, “Follow me, and I will make you become fishers of men.”
Luke 6:46 “Why do you call me LORD, LORD and not do what I tell you?”
Luke 9:23 And he said to all, “If anyone would come after me, let him deny himself and take up his cross daily and follow me.”
John 8:12 Again Jesus spoke to them, saying, “I am the light of the world. Whoever follows me will not walk in darkness, but will have the light of life.”
John 10:27 – 28 My sheep hear my voice, and I know them, and they follow me. I give them eternal life, and they will never perish, and no one will snatch them out of my hand. . . “
John 14:15 “If you love me, you will keep my commandments. . .”
James 1:22 But be doers of the word, and not hearers only, deceiving yourselves.
God wants us to become new creatures, casting out our evil, selfish, self -centered ways, and becoming loving and giving, eager to be serving others who need. There are so many people who seem to be natural givers. Mother Theresa, Carrie ten Bloom, and many others, including a couple within my own family. I feel like a Cretan compared to them. (And yes, I know I am not supposed to compare!)
So many passages remind us to do for others; get up, off your duff and do. He doesn’t want us just being mouthpieces, claiming we believe in Him and want to do right, and then largely doing NOTHING. There are always folks worse off than you and you can lend a hand; certainly not necessarily money. (In fact, I am abundantly blessed.) But you can read to elderly persons who can no longer see well enough to, spend time in a library reading to a children’s group, maybe help a young student just learning and having a little problem with math or reading, or some other subject you are good at; you can volunteer to give a young mother a break by babysitting her children so she can go shopping or have an afternoon to herself, perhaps you can mow someone’s lawn, maybe you can make cupcakes when it’s a neighbor’s turn to bake them for her child’s class—and it is one more stress she does not need. Perhaps you can volunteer to pick up groceries for an ill or elderly neighbor. The point is, we all can help others, should help others, and not just see a need and walk past it; but actually do something to help.
I ask God to open my eyes to opportunities to help, and when I hear of a need, I try to act. But I don’t actively seek those opportunities, and that is one area I would like to see change in my life. There are so many things I could do if I knew of the need. But I think I need to step out and find the needs.
I know several from my church who routinely step out. It’s perhaps time for me to hold onto their shirt-tails until I find the avenues to walk and serve. If I can mention several areas of helping others, I ought to be able to find the persons who need those services.
There are many different ways you can find opportunities. You can check with your church—members may know of another member who is ill or needing help, the grocery store sometimes allows folks to put up cards with a request of help, deacons at church are also good resources, one can check at hospitals or you can look at local chapters of Meals on Wheels, elderly facilities such as memory care, nursing homes, and so forth. You can volunteer at a local Salvation Army, Good Will, Food Bank, and so many more resources. It might take some exploring through internet for local opportunities, but they are there. I’ve decided I have sat back long enough waiting for opportunities to present themselves, but I need to step out and seek.
Thank You, Lord, for reminding me of persons from my church for me to reach out and get information. Take me out of my selfish ways to reach out. It is so much better to give than to sit and wait…Thank You for all You have done to guide me and ‘mybellaviews.’
Deuteronomy 8:2 Remember how the LORD your God led you all the way in the wilderness these forty years, to humble and test you in order to know what was in your heart.
Deuteronomy 32:10 He found him in a desert land, and in the howling waste of the wilderness; he encircled him, he cared for him, he kept him as the apple of his eye.
Psalm 34:1 I will extol the LORD at all times; his praise will always be on my lips.
Psalm 52:8-9 But I am like an olive tree, thriving in the house of God, I will always trust in God’s unfailing love. I will praise you forever, O God, for what you have done. I will trust in your good name in the presence of your faithful people.
Isaiah 43:2-3 When you pass through the waters, I will be with you: and through the rivers, they shall not overthrow you.
Isaiah 43:19 Behold, I am doing a new thing; now it springs forth, do you not perceive it? I will make a way in the wilderness and rivers in the desert.
Romans 5:3-5 . . . we also glory in our sufferings, because we know that suffering produces perseverance; perseverance, character; and character, hope.
Philippians 4:4-8 Always be full of joy in the LORD, I say it again–rejoice! Let everyone see that you are considerate in all you do. Remember, the LORD is coming soon. Don’t worry about anything; instead, pray about everything. Tell God what you need, and thank him for all he has done.
1 Thessalonians 5:16-18 Always be joyful. Never stop praying. Be thankful in all circumstances, for this is God’s will for you who belong to Christ Jesus.
James 1:2-4 Dear brothers and sisters, when troubles of any kind come your way, consider it an opportunity for great joy. For you know that when your faith is tested, your endurance has a chance to grow.
Many know I have had an unexpected detour which has required moving about on an unpaved road with several ruts and fears about “bottoming out” my chassis! In fact my chassis met the dining room floor with a resounding smack, and required a change of my independent, ‘come and go’ lifestyle. As I was reading a devotional on the book of Daniel, I wondered if I was possibly as arrogant and prideful as King Nebuchadnezzar, and this was going to be a time of great humility. So thankful, not eating grass, sleeping under the dew and stars, sweltering in the heat with flies, fleas, and other yucky crawling things, but definitely a humbling time to walk or relearn to walk with walker and other aids.
But, it has also been a time of being thankful, and recognizing how rich my life is–because He has blessed me. Then, in itself is humbling to recognize the number of folks who are saying prayers and checking in on recovery, offering to help in whatever manner they can, and to pick up the phone and send a note or a phone call, or mailing a lovely card with hand written notes and prayers for recovery. I wondered how often I really made much of a difference; but this “crash” has made me realize I apparently do, and in turn people reach out, and have said how much I am appreciated in THEIR eyes. What a wonderful feeling! One wants to make a positive difference to others, but I think wonder if they truly do.
And yet, I have a bunch of folks who have made a difference in my life–some wonderful people. Two of my grandparents made a huge impact, even if one of them was only until I was 11 years old, but my parents, my parents, a couple of nursing supervisors who tried to encourage me into management–which I never felt comfortable attempting. I liked, still like, hands on whether it be mothering, nursing, volunteering for different areas I know am good at doing. Others bless me with their out-going personality as I am much more introverted and lack the confidence to initiate a conversation. But God has placed me in areas where I do have some skill and comfort and has tended my growth and development much like I tend my gardens and flower beds. He has placed opportunities in my path and by saying yes, I have grown in confidence in that area of serving. Better late than never!
But I only had one other serious accident in my life, other than this chassis adventure. The first was breaking my shoulder, again doing an activity and making a foolish decision. Because that was my right arm–and I had joked, although firmly believed, my left hand would not have a clue as to how to act if something happened to my right. The left had just been a support–maybe to hold the handle of a pan while I did whatever with the right; to just supported a vial so the right could use the syringe and withdraw a medication, or whatever. My left was never in charge. Then, the good LORD had me make a foolish decision causing the break of the right shoulder. NOTHING worked. Fingers did not flex, without my sling, the entire arm hung useless, and I had to learn to dress the right arm with the left maneuvering the clothing into proper order, the left had to “learn” to eat with a fork, sign my name, stir and take pots off the stove, bathe myself, even wash my hair with the left and then rinse and towel dry it. That too, was entirely humbling. And I was afraid. It was a couple months before the nerves reconnected and I could wriggle the fingers of right hand, when out of the sling for short periods, the appendage had minimal movement. How was I ever to get back to nursing? Would I ever be able to?
Once outpatient PT started for my arm, I was set before this large metal ring hanging on a wall with many spokes. The idea was to hold a spoke and make the entire wheel go around while you held on, stretching the muscles, tendons and so forth. Initially, there was no way. So I cheated, I could start about 10 o’clock, make it almost to quarter of, then would tap the wheel so it spun and would meet it at the 10 o’clock area again. Eventually, cheating or not, I regained that range of motion.
When my body thwacked against the dining floor, I knew I’d broken something. No question in my mind. The sensation, although a totally different area, was an immediate flashback to breaking the shoulder. Testing revealed a couple of fractures in the pelvis and one in my lower back, and was told it would be a 6-12 week recovery. ‘Oh, no, LORD, that is too long. I have things I am committed to doing, and need to be well before then.’
Thankfully, I had great knowledgeable caretakers, and as I write this, it is just a day shy of the 4 week mark for that “crash.” I am amazed at the progress–and truly it is the LORD’s healing more than my work. But I am willing to work, but the knitting of these bones back into place and the speed it is occurring all is thanks to Him. My neighbors and family know I am anxious to get home and see my pets–even if just for a few hours. But, the neighbors arranged me to stay at their home–they have an indoor elevator–and we will hopefully do a firepit in the driveway of one of their homes–and get the 14 of us or so together.
So, this has been humbling, but I cannot state how grateful I am. This could have been a lot worse–head injury, more than one vertebra broken, maybe even with paralysis, but instead God used it to remind me of all the wonderful people, family and friends are in my life. And, I think to urge me to be able to share my testimony–for those who know my introverted shyness, yes, the idea is causing me to shake. But doesn’t the Word say “do not fear for I am with you?” Repeatedly? And although I have never counted, I have heard over 300 times it is in the Word, and have also read 365–one for each day of the year.
I believe this experience has been a time of testing, spiritual preparation, and showing me more of God’s provisions.
I have also read that shyness is a bit self-centered. One is wondering too much about their presentation, appearance, how they will be judged and if anyone will care what they say, and it becomes a “me, me, me” thought process. So, maybe He is encouraging the next phase of my journey with Him. After all He has done for me, how can I let a little thing like publicly giving Him praise to stop me from sharing my testimony of healing and growth?
Lord, you have always given me great and wonderful love. I did not always recognize it–like many other selfish folks, thought it was my due. But you chose me and have shown me a different way to think and live. You have steered me away from much of my selfishness, guided me and ‘mybellaviews.’
Hi, I'm Kathy. Welcome to my website!