Journal vs God Bag

Deuteronomy 32:4     He is the Rock, His works are perfect, and all His works are perfect, and all His ways are just.  A faithful God who does no wrong, upright and just is He.

Proverbs 28:9     If anyone turns a deaf ear to my instruction, even their prayers are detestable.

Mark 11:24     Therefore I tell you, whatever you ask for in prayer, believe that you have received it, and it will be yours.

John 15:7     If you remain in me and my words remain in you, ask whatever you wish, and it will be done for you.

Philippians 4:6     Do not be anxious about anything, but in every situation, by prayers and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God.

Colossians 4:2     Devote yourselves to prayer, being watchful and prayerful.

James 1:5 – 7    If any of you lacks wisdom, you should ask God, who gives generously to all without finding fault, and it will be given to you.  But when you ask, you must believe and not doubt, because the one who doubts is like a wave of the sea, blown and tossed by the wind.  That person should expect to receive anything from the Lord.

James 4:3     When you ask, you do not receive because you ask with wrong motives, that you may spend what you get on your pleasures.

1 John 5:14-15    And this is the confidence we have in approaching God: that if we ask anything according to His will, He hears us. And if we know that He hears us—whatever we ask—we know that we have what we asked of Him.


Do you journal?  I would love to, and yet as often as I have started, I write for 2, maybe three days, then it will lapse for a couple weeks.  I don’t understand why I don’t seem able to continue them.

I had read, heard, or somehow learned to really hand my concerns over to God, and it helped your brain realize yiu did not have the issue anymore for you to actively do away if you did something visual.  I started writing out thoughts, prayers, wishes on a slip of paper then sliding it into this bag on the back of my closet door.  But dropping the prayer, concern, dream into the bag, meant it was not yours to deal with–and you had to trust Him with it.  Once the thought came into your head to worry and fret and “fix” it, you needed to mentally hand it back.  He was taking care of it–so no touching!   That was difficult for me to do since I tended to believe I was supposed to fix all.  But over time it go easier for me to return the issue over, and when it popped into my mind–send Satan scampering away, and tell God I had handed it over, and was sorry for getting impatient–AGAIN.  

The problem was that I did not use a notebook or record so when the answer came, I could page back and write His response. His answers/solutions to my prayers.  I can recount many—yet how squishy have our, at least my, memory has become.  I don’t remember the exact time or path.  I don’t know if I recognized that it had been answered until hindsight kicked in.   If I journaled routinely, my praise is recorded and I can easily go back and check the length of time, how frustrated, perhaps anxious I was during that time, but with the God bag, I never recorded the answers and resolutions.  So although I love the visual of dropping my issues in His lap–I have no record of His direction, answers, or anything.  Just a faulty memory

Certainly, it was a way to remind me of prayers answered when I would dump them out and re-read them.  There was no way to track MY growth with God.  Truly most it accomplished was the visual of putting my prayers and concerns in His Hands through the action of dropping it in a bag—then reminding myself that God had it whenever I thought I should snatch it back and handle it myself.

It would be better to have kept a journal I wrote in regularly; and when prayers were answered could immediately return to that page and write out the answer, praise, and thanks.  To have a record which my family could read upon my death and realize the number of times my prayers centered around them and God’s will for them, and how He dealt with whatever concern I had for them or other issues, at any given time.  But I don’t have that.  I had a gift bag full of handwritten prayers; but nothing about the when and how the answers had come.  That is a regret.

I also had a bible I’d had for 7-8 years which contained thoughts, prayers and praises for the past several years.  However, I had adopted a lovely dog who was as sweet as she could be—but in her anxiety, and need to entertain herself, soothed herself with shaking my bible and devotionals into confetti. That  first day, coming home and finding those bible shreds, my heart broke a bit.  There was not enough left of my bible to put any of the pages together, and certainly there was no way my bible would ever be my Book again.  All my thoughts, prayers, answered prayers– gone into confetti. 

She did this several times over the many months until finally my behavior about putting them out of reach became consistent.  She eventually had me trained to put my devotionals and new bible materials out of her reach.  I am sure Amazon thought I had a Christian bookstore started since I had to replace them at least eight times over the months.

But how much has my memory failed?  How often have some prayers been answered and I don’t even remember?  I am thankful for so much, but how often have I missed thanking Him for something specific I asked for but had forgotten?  How disappointing that by using my ‘God bag’ I had missed recording some praises.   My destroyed bible had many prayers and praises, but still not like those who keep journals throughout most of their lives.

I am going to continue asking God to help me write in the journal.  I no longer use the God bag, as I keep a note in my bible or on my computer.  But the journal is better; so my prayer is that I will start to be consistent in recording thoughts, prayers and praises.  But they will be accessible for me and my family to see growth, answers, and thankfulness.

Thank You for helping me to grow and better understand You and my life with You.  You are so gracious and reassuring in my life and in ‘mybellaviews.’