Jeremiah 29:11 “For I know the plans I have for you,” declares the Lord, “plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future.”
Matthew 7:7 Ask and it will be given to you; seek and you will find; knock and the door will be opened to you.
Luke 11:9 So I tell you; ask and it will be given to you: seek and you will find: know and the door will be opened to you.
2 Timothy 1:9 For God saved us and called us to live a holy life. He did this, not because we deserved it, but because that was his plan.
Most friendships and deeper relationships grow only after developing a foundation of trust. Trust is needed before the relationship can grow and develop. And it takes time to build trust. Persons may be in your circle yet are not in the friend category. You generally are not sharing anything except that is important to you. Conversation is generally of the ‘how’s the weather’ type of topics, which don’t really need trust. If it is a cashier, you might glance at and mentally have tallied what your change will be, but that is it. There is no sharing of deep secrets, and intimate feelings. There is no real investment with that exchange or relationship with that person. It takes time before some surface confidences deepen.
But friends and friendships are totally different. Those are important and require a foundation, a sturdy, not leaky foundation. And until you have a firm foundation, you don’t share the most intimate details of your life—good or bad. With acquaintances or just some you are not as close with you don’t have that deep element of trust. You care for the person, but it’s not the same level. I think most of the women in my circles tend to be trusting when they initially meet someone and will give the benefit of doubt until and unless someone breaks the trust. There are many ways to break trust—gossiping, lying, consistently making plans and not showing up, stealing, saying hurtful things—not necessarily a lie, but a deep jab, using someone’s weakness or sensitivity against them. It’s been a long time, thankfully, that I have been with females who behave like that, but I well remember the cliques in high school and the mean-spirited, hurtful thrusts.
And all good relationships take time to develop. Along the same hesitant vein as building human relationships, it often takes time for us to build and trust in Jesus. Oftentimes, this is even more difficult for some as you can’t see Him. You don’t always hear a verbal guide, promise, or loving comment. You have to open the Bible, to study WHO His word says He is, and test it. He stands by His word, His promises. He encourages you to test His word. Our God is steady, sturdy, stable, and substantial. But, like all relationships, we sometimes need to test if He will really be there, will really rescue and guide us. That is from our uncertainties because of previous human relationships we have had during our life, as well as the times we recognize we were not the most sturdy and dependable in a relationship. We have learned to be mistrustful, hesitant, guarded. . .and ‘can it REALLY be? He wants me, He chose me? Me?’ It can be a humbling thought to know that God chose you.
And yes, He chose even me! All this doubt, uncertainty comes until you know in your heart, mind and soul, that YES, HE WANTS YOU! HE LOVES YOU. He knows who you are—all your faults, flaws, sins, and muck and mire…He knows, and is so thankful that You chose Him back. He’s always chosen you, and He waited patiently for YOU to choose HIM.
The delay was yours. God loves unconditionally and waits steadfastly for us to realize He loves us and wants to support and embrace us. He is consistent, steady, loving, forgiving, and wants to help us and give us rest always. The mistrust comes from us—our past has hindered or experienced broken trust relationships. It may have started as very young children seeing “loving” parents fight, hurt, and create havoc in a home, being told that parents love one another, then seeing/hearing/witnessing the opposite of any kind of love and respect.
It may have been a friend who lied, gossiped, ridiculed you; it may have been a peer or someone you worked with who ‘stole’ your work and passed it off as their own, it may have been a sibling stealing something you valued, or lying about something in which you were punished, but they were not. Our mistrust is caused by people, not by God, yet, because we don’t see Him, sit on His lap, and fully trust what we can’t see, we doubt. And sometimes our prayers are not answered in the manner we prayed and wished for—someone died yet we wanted, believed and expected their full recovery; wanted their full recovery; someone is living with addiction, and because we know God’s word says ‘Ask, Seek, Knock and you will receive’ (Matt 7:7-12) we expect immediate gratification to what we pray for. If our prayers are not answered according to OUR desires, we begin to question the bond of trust.
We frequently need to see Him be steadfast and sturdy and experience the evidence of Him being in our life, before we fully trust. Listening to what He says when we pray can help us become more trusting. We may have to wait, the answer may be different than what we prayed for, and we are left feeling adrift, lost, hurt and confused.
We don’t know God’s mind, but we do know He has good plans for us, plans to prosper and not to hinder (Jeremiah 29:11). But when we don’t always see the results of our prayers the way we want, we wonder, maybe wander a bit away from His truth, staying on the fringes, but the bonds of trust have weakened. We are a people who expect immediate gratification, and what we want when we ask or expect.
Early in my walk with Jesus, I would test frequently. It was the story of Gideon in Judges 6 which had me walking forward and saying “I accept.” So for a long while, I tested. “God, I’m not sure if this is right. If I should do this, then this will happen, but if You want this, then another will happen.” I was new, not in a strong church with bible studies, and so on, so I was not reading the bible often, and when I was, my mind danced in dizzying circles trying to understand the KJV and proper English. So I depended on the “fleece” results for years.
I had some good Christian friends, bought a good easier to understand bible, and found a new church in the area I had moved. Let me tell you how shocked and apologetic I was to read, “You should not test the Lord your God.” (Deuteronomy 6:16, and Matthew 4:7).
Aw-oh! I had tested and used “fleeces” for years! Yikes, maybe He was disgusted with me now. But I ‘began studying more diligently and found God is steady, sturdy, long suffering and Knows me long before my parents were interested in one another! I grew in my knowledge of who He is, and who I am to He wants to me to become. I attended bible studies, hung with other Christian women, continued reading and seeking. And I grew in my knowledge—and my trust. So then it was relationship rather than scary deity. I became secure He loved me—but I would get nervous when He was silent sometimes, but I learned the issue was mine. It is the Holy Spirit who leads us to answers, uncovers hidden sins, blockades to deepening our relationship with God. It is the Holy Spirit who puts verses in our minds, who is our Counselor. Romans 8:26-28, John 14:16
I do trust in this relationship and in His word. I share them when I can and believe in His promises. I may never see some of the things I am praying for come to pass—all family members being saved, but even if they accept when I am in the everlasting home, promise kept.
Thank You, God. You patiently let me examine the bricks of trust in this relationship and You just kept adding to them, until my whole heart was in. Thank You that I am so much less mistrustful and hesitant now. You have opened me to many wonderful friends and adventures. Thank You for all You continue to do for me and ‘mybellaviews.’
Matthew 5:42 give to the one who asks you, and do not turn away from the one who wants to borrow from you.
Matthew 7:12 So, in everything, do to others what you would have them do to you, for this sums up the Law and the Prophets.
Luke 6:27,28 “But to you who are listening, I say: Love your enemies, do good to those who hate you, bless those who curse you, pray for those who mistreat you.
Luke 6:35,36 But love your enemies, do good to them, and lend to them without expecting to get anything back. Then your reward will be great, and you will be children of the Most High, because he is kind to the ungrateful and wicked. Be merciful, just as your Father is merciful.
Galatians 6:9,10 Let us not become weary of doing good, for at the proper time we will reap a harvest if we do not give up. Therefore, as we have opportunity, let us do good to all people, especially those who belong to the family of believers.
Ephesians 4:32 Be kind to one another, tenderhearted, forgiving one another, as God in Christ forgave you.
1 Thessalonians 5:11 Therefore encourage one another and build each other up just as in fact you are doing.
I have a friend who is a New Age thinker, and believes this philosophy is new, different. She belongs to many women groups and believes in love, tolerance, and peace. Hmmm, I believe that is what God/Jesus and the Holy Spirit want. When I say that to her, she becomes defensive and insists there is violence and no tolerance in the bible stories.
Hmmm, I believe you may be taking things out of context. There was a lot of killing as the Israelites were entering into the promised land, but they were killing these people who were immoral and sacrificing children and they were worshiping stone and wood idols and not the only true God. It becomes a huge, disgusted discussion on her part, and she will finally snap, “You have your opinion, I have mine. But the world stinks with this hypocritical religion and I want no part of it.”
God created the world, and His intent was people would live with Him in the Garden, and they only had to avoid eating from one tree in that Garden, (and that was for obedience to a command) and they would forever having a close, intimate relationship with God. He loved them.
But being enticed to eat of the fruit from that tree, “for certainly he won’t kill you,” and first the woman and then the man took the fruit, ate, and committed the first sin. That sin was the death of the intimacy and the closeness they had shared with God. So, in a sense it was a death, and Satan’s tempting lies had accomplished what he always desires–a huge separation from God. Goal accomplished. Satan always wants to drag us further from God, to convince us we are not loved, are not even worthy of love because we are huge sinners, we are too disgusting to be loved by God, and the lies go on and on. If Satan can keep us separated from reaching out to God, he has succeeded, and we are the losers.
But with all the self-help books and programs to improve our life, and make us happier, we buy into the information, which is often just ok. But God’s words are true now as they were then. Folks will edit what they don’t want to read or face; what they have decided is now right because after all those words in the Old Testament were written thousands of years ago; they wouldn’t be pertinent now in the New Testament. And even with that, the New Testament was written about 2100 years ago. ‘So all that is not really pertinent to now either.’
But, I have never read that any of God’s words were to be discarded or removed. God’s Words stand; there is no addendum saying that now any of His commands and edicts were to be changed after so many years. Striking out because one does not want to hear or be told what the bible says is truth may go against what one believes or wants in his or her life, does not change the outcome.
God is love. And that too has been refuted by some who do not want to really know what the bible says. They know that God struck down many as the Israelites pushed into the Promised Land and the outlying areas after spending 40 years in the wilderness; but they do not know why. God wanted those who were blatantly sinning with immorality, sacrificing children, worshipping wooden or metal idols to be abolished so the Israelites would not be subject and enticed to follow those practices and therefore sin.
What we say, and our opinions about the Bible’s truth do not change the outcomes in it. I have so many friends who do not agree with the bible; they do not want to discipline children ‘to avoid hurting their feelings,’ they are using many medications to dull pain and things they don’t wish to deal with, and who live in same sex relationships, and who talk and gossip and hurt others. These are basically good, kind and loving men and women, but it is not for me to judge them. It is for me to love and honor them. If they ask, I will be more than happy to share what the Bible says, but I cannot judge them. That is reserved for God and His Son, Jesus. And they will be the ones to judge me on the Last Day also.
God’s in charge. He oversees, and even when bad things happen, He can work things out for our benefit and His glory. God gives, He loves, and He has offered a way to make it that we are freed from the punishment of sin, which we deserve, but Jesus did not. Jesus, the Son of God willingly gave His life to a horrific death, to free us from the punishment of the sin we deserve.
We all have said, “I’m not that bad; I don’t really sin….” No one can say they are sinless. Even the cocky men who presented the woman “caught in the act” to Jesus (and just an aside….caught in the act, but no man with her?) and He said with apparently little regard for the outcome, “Whoever is without sin, cast the first stone.”
We are blessed that God designed a way to allow us to have the original closeness He wanted to have with us in the Garden, and to have a relationship with the trinity now. Jesus’s death allowed the Holy Spirit to come and if we choose to accept the offer, He will reside in us, and help show us the way, how to pray, remind us of helpful verses we might need in a moment and to deepen the relationship with Jesus/God/and Holy Spirit.
I pray for my family and friends who have not done enough research to see if God is real. Rebuke Him at your own knowledge of eternity if you want, but don’t do it without an honest attempt to find Him. He has redeemed me, set me free, and brought me such happiness and peace. Thank You God for all you have done for me and ‘mybellaviews.’
Matthew 6:33 “But seek first his kingdom and his righteousness, and all these things will be given to you as well.”
Matthew 22:37-40 Jesus replied: “Love the Lord you God with all your heart and with all your should and with all your mind. This is the first and greatest commandment. And the second is like it: ‘Love your neighbor as yourself. All the Law and the Prophets hand on these two commandments.”
John 6:29 Jesus answered, “The work of God is this: to believe in the one he has sent.”
John 15:13 Greater love has no man than this: to lay down one’s life for one’s friends.
Luke 6:27 But love your enemies, and do good, and lend, expecting nothing in return, and your reward will be great.
Acts 16:31 Believe in the Lord Jesus and you will be saved—you and your household.
Colossians 3:23-24 Whatever you do, work at it with all your heart, as working for the Lord, not for human masters, since you know that you will receive and inheritance from the Lord as a reward. It is the Lord Christ you are serving.
Philippians 2:3-4 Do nothing out of selfish ambition or vain conceit. Rather, in humility value others above yourselves, not looking to your own interests but each of you to the interests of others.
Hebrews 13:16 Do not neglect to do good and to share what you have, for such sacrifices are pleasing to God.
James 1:27 Pure, unstained religion, according to God our Father, is to take care of orphans and widows when they are distressed and to keep oneself unstained from the world.
2 Peter 3:18 But grow in the grace and knowledge of our Lord and Savior Jesus Christ.
I think we all wonder at times what God wants from us. We know He wants us to “love” others; but what does that really mean? I mean we really have to love our neighbor who continues to walk by the house daily and let his dog use my yard as the toilet? Even after I have asked repeatedly to please pick up the mess?
And what about this woman who continues to talk nasty about me to others when I have never done anything to her or had many dealings with her? Why is she able to do that behavior and I am not even supposed to defend myself?
And then there is this peer who does not finish her own tasks for her job, and it is up to me to finish her job. It seems like all think she is the ‘golden girl’ and yet I am doing my job and needing to finish hers. Is that right? Does anyone see?
I believe in helping another—two often get a job more completely and easily accomplished. I used teamwork a lot when I was working and it was easier to turn patients and give good, and better, skin care when I could hold the person in one direction—the other did back care and changed one side of the bed, then we turned the person to the other side and made the other side of the bed. Ease and comfort for all in half the time.
I like that Jesus sent His disciples out in pairs—they each had company, could share ideas and decisions about direction, which town to head to next, how it was felt their message was received, and of course one could take care of the other if an injury or illness should befall one.
But we have work to do in the world. Our first directives are to love God first and only; then we are to follow and obey His commandments, and be kind to others, give to others when they have less than us, teach about the love and obedience of Jesus and the fact He, by His act of love, freed us from facing a life full of sin and loss.
But God wants us to not be complaining about others and wants us to forgive. He will take care of any who sin against us. We are to do the best of our ability, no matter the job, and do it with a heart for Him; we are to do our chores as though they were directly for God.
That’s not always easy. It is difficult to be with someone who refuses to finish their own work and asks you to complete, and yet the person takes all the credit; it’s difficult when a pet owner does not clean up after their pet—even after the fact the issue has been addressed. It’s frustrating when you would not treat another in such a manner, but they do to you.
But God sees all, and He will deal with the matters of slight and insult you have to deal with. It is your responsibility to just do the work He asks of you—loving Jesus, searching to know Him deeper, loving others and treating them with the respect you want to be treated with, being kind and giving to those less fortunate, reaching out in love to help no matter the request, and teaching others, by showing, what the love of Jesus looks like. There may be times you are dealing with a person who will not give and remains stubborn and acting unpleasant, but we are not to sink to that level.
I don’t always succeed in being the best I can be—my temper can show when I feel I’ve been dealt an unfair hand. But I can recognize that I have grown some and continue to move forward. I am thankful I am walking forward, that I can see progress even though it’s small increments, and I remember that all is God’s to deal with and He will. So as much as I would like fairness in the work force, and respect of my yard and taking care of one’s pets—that is not the way others think. God’s got my back, and I may be somewhat disgruntled, but He is judging my behavior and outlook, and He will deal with the other person in His time and manner. That is NOT for me to worry about. I am just supposed to worry about my own ‘p’s and q’s.’
Thank You God for guiding me down this slow growth in Your path, for Your patience and guidance. You have always been there for me and ‘mybellaviews.’
Psalm 55:22 Cast your cares on the Lord and he will sustain you; he will never let the righteous be shaken.
Proverbs 3:5-8 Trust in the Lord with all your heart and lean not on your understanding; inn all your ways submit to him, and he will make your paths straight. Do not be wise in your own eyes; fear the Lord and shun evil. This will bring health to your body and nourishment to your bones.
Matthew 6:34 therefore do not worry about tomorrow, for tomorrow will worry about itself. Each day has enough trouble of its own.
Matthew 10:31 So do not be afraid; you are worth more than many sparrows.
Philippians 4:6-7 Do not be anxious about anything, but in every situation, by prayer and petition, present your requests to God. And the peace of God which transcends all understanding will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus.
James 1:6 but when you ask, you must believe and not doubt, because the one who doubts is like a wave of the sea, blown and tossed by the wind.
1 Peter 5:7 Cast your cares upon him, for he cares for you.
Years ago, I fretted about everything—anything. I was in charge, a single parent, responsible for all the bills, the physical, mental, and emotional health of my son, and I had to do it right. I was working full-time and going to school full time and very dependent on parents and friends to watch my son when I was away. It was stressful. And yes, I worried. I used to wonder if I could get the biggest prize for worrying and fretting.
It was a stressful, gnawing time. I could picture the goal, but not see it, not really see any light at the end of my worry tunnel. I hated having to ask for help, although in all honesty help was offered by my parents, my siblings if they were free and by my friends. I was blessed.
But at the time I was anxious about being a good parent, a good daughter as I frequently had to ask them to watch my son, and sometimes it was for an overnight if I was working an off shift or had to do a school project late. I didn’t want to abuse relationships and take advantage of the goodness offered to me. It felt like a vicious cycle at times.
And of course, then I was worried about money—’making the mortgage, and please don’t let the car have ANY issues. Please don’t let either of us be sick; oh, stop growing so fast, clothes are expensive, food is going up; the house needs oil and that’s expensive….’
And on and on my thoughts skipped and fluttered through my mind.
Then, somewhere along my path, I heard about taking all your worries, writing them down, and putting them in a bag, a literal bag, and leaving them there. That bag was to be for God to open, and He would handle what was inside. Could I do this? The control freak and worry wort that I am/was—could I possibly hand over, truly, hand over my worries and ‘let go, and let God’?
By snatching things back and worrying about them, I was blatantly saying, “I don’t trust You.” The reality is, “I fear it may be an answer and a situation I don’t want to face.” But He is in charge. He will help us get through whatever comes our way. But I think He feels slapped in the face to have one of His staunch supporters be worried and worried. I get it as I did that for years, but it was not demonstrating and living as though I trust Him.
Since my nature is to control and make sure all things are running like a fine-tuned machine, this whole God bag process was difficult. ‘What if God didn’t want to handle this? What if He was late? What if….’ Then, it was like I was hit with a bucket of ice water in the face. I suddenly realized if I was questioning this, I was NOT handing my issues over, I was NOT being honest that I trusted Him to come through for me, and I was trying to maintain control—even though I already knew I was not doing a very good job, and was feeling tired, anxious, fretful, and overwhelmed. So, so much for me listening and believing the verse, “my yoke is easy, my burden is light.” Matthew 11:30
I was trying to maintain control. AGAIN. And that must mean that I did not believe God could handle it, that He might not care enough to handle it for me/us, that I thought I could do a better job, or that I just didn’t have faith. AW-OH, NOW THAT SCARED ME TO DEATH. NO FAITH? Then no eternity with Him.
I’ll confess it took some doing. Satan would deliver those worries to my mind, at first, frequently. But I would recognize the worry after a few minutes, and then say, “No, this is not my worry. I gave it to God, and I am not snatching it back. He’s got this.”
But over time, it was less and less often that the worry would come back, and it became easier and easier to tell Satan to flee and take those anxious thoughts with him, as I had already given it to God, and it was being handled. I believe Satan got very tired of trying to wear me down on that area and moved on to other vulnerabilities.
Initially, I called the bag on the back of my bedroom door, ‘my God bag.’ It was visual, accessible, and I would write out concerns, worries, fears, whatever, and put them in the bag—a cheap little cloth bag that had held a pair of socks one Christmas. Someone had a small Crown Royal bottle, and it came with a navy felt bag with a gold cord to pull the top tight. I thought that would be perfect as my God bag! I asked for the bag and got it, and now felt like my thoughts were going directly to the Royal Crown of my life.
I still have a bag on the bedroom door, but it’s rare I have to actually write and put anything in it. I know the routine, and now can easily tell God my concern and say, “I’m handing this over. You know my heart, and I know You have my best interests in Your hands. I trust You.”
Many years have passed since I started using the God bag/my Royal Crown bag. And I must say each time I see that bag, I smile and say ‘You really are the Royal-est of Crowns! Thank You.’ But I’ve learned a lot and developed more and more faith and am so thankful He has guided my steps so well as long as I truly handed things to Him. He has always done right for me and ‘mybellaviews.’
Genesis 22:1-18 After these things God tested Abraham and said to him, “Abraham!” And he said, “Here I am.” He said, “Take your son, you only son Isaac, whom you love, and go to the land of Moriah, and offer him there as a burnt offering on one of the mountains which I shall tell you.” . . . and in your offspring shall all the nations of the earth be blessed, because you have obeyed my voice.”
Deuteronomy 8:2 You shall remember all the way which the LORD your God has led you in the wilderness these forty years, that He might humble you, testing you, to know what was in your heart, whether you would keep His commandments or not.
Ecclesiastes 3:18 I said to myself concerning the sons of men, “God has surely tested them in order for them to see that they are but beasts.”
Psalm 11:5 The Lord tests the righteous and the wicked, and the one who loves violence His soul hates.
Proverbs 17:. 3 The refining pot is for silver and the furnace for gold, but the Lord tests hearts
Isaiah 48:10 “Behold, I have refined you, but not as silver; I have tested you in the furnace of affliction.”
Jeremiah 17:10 I, the Lord, search the heart, I test the mind, even to give to each man according to his ways, according to the results of his deeds.
John 6:6 He said this to test him, for he himself knew what he would do.
James 1:3 knowing that the testing of your faith produces endurance.
When I first accepted Jesus’s invitation the gospel reading was Judges 6:36-40. I took the message to heart and was forever testing to see what God would have me do. I bombarded Him with “If this….then that. Show me how You want me to proceed.” And He was faithful and answered me a lot over the years. But it stunted me as I became dependent on that kind of testing and was not deepening, or actually developing a true relationship with Him. But eventually He called me on it, letting me know He was not to be treated like a genie in a bottle, but as GOD, CREATOR, LORD OF ALL.
All my closest people knew I depended on these fleeces. But I was upfront with all so that if I ‘slipped’ they could remind me I was not to proceed that way. So, although I rarely am so bedraggled, I cannot figure the direction He wants for me, when I am truly unsure, I do put out the fleece. . . and make my decision on whether it is wet or dry in the morning! I can’t say I totally gave up my ‘fleece’ guidance, but I saved these for when I was totally confused, totally unsure of really big decisions.
Thankfully, I had folks in my life who could guide me to the biblical churches, different bible studies, and I found some tv pastors I enjoyed—Charles Stanley, Dr, Jeremiah, Andy Stanley—and I was able to grow. God does open doors!!
But I was in a discussion about whether God tests or does not. I had several verses that sprang into my mind that He certainly does test us. I don’t think God tests us for Himself. Nothing comes as a surprise for God, but I think He tests us for us; to show us yes, we choose Him first. Or, unfortunately that we do not choose Him first, and we need to repent and realize we are more like Peter in the courtyard than we could imagine.
I also find strength in the testing and the acknowledgment from James that ‘testing produces endurance.’ Jesus promised that we would have difficulties, hardships and sometimes be overcome with troubles. I believe we are tested, and our responses are to show us we did not stand strong, believing that Jesus had this covered. Or that we did stand strong and trusted in Him even though grief stricken and screaming in agony. But we trusted. And that’s the test. And how awesome when you pass.
I do believe God knows all. He knows what we will do and choose and how we will behave before we are confronted with an incident. He doesn’t need to test us to show Himself our choices, but to show US our choices, poor or good. He wants us to succeed, and by testing us He can show us we have made the correct choices, and He gives us a pat-on-the-back sense of satisfaction because we recognize we did not fail the test. Just like getting an exam paper back in school marked with an ‘A.’ That is the kind of excitement and happiness I get when I realize I made a correct decision in His eyes.
Lord, I spent years testing You and You always passed. I like things so much better now that I’m developing a deeper relationship and trust with You. You prod and encourage me to go deeper, and I know how You have blessed me and ‘mybellaviews.’ Thank You and all Praise to You.
Hi, I'm Kathy. Welcome to my website!