Matthew 7:1-3 “Judge not, that you be not judged. For with what judgment you judge, you will be judged; and with the measure you use, it will be measured back to you. And why do you look at the speck in your brother’s eye, but do not consider the plank in your own eye?
John 7:24 Do not judge according to appearance, but judge with righteous judgment.
Romans 2:3 And do you think this, O man, you who judge those practicing such things, and doing the same, that you will escape the judgment of God?
Romans 14:13 Therefore let us not judge one another anymore, but rather resolve this, not to put a stumbling block or a cause to fall in our brother’s way
Do you find yourself judging? I do, and am hearing a lot of judgmental comments while dashing to a grocery store quickly. There is a lot going on in our country right now with the virus, fears and anxieties related to that, political decisions, disparagements, and then the violence stirred up by anxieties, fears, anger, misbehaviors, disrespect for other opinions and rights, and so on. We speak of the Perfect Storm and I think of the movie of the lost fishermen off the coast of the Cape in MA. But things are simmering, in some areas boiling and people are acting in a damaging manner. We may be approaching a new and different perfect storm for our country; one we have witnessed in news reports in other countries in the past.
We all judge many things. We judge what and how to teach good behavior in our children and how we are going to train and educate them to perform with respect and proper polite behavior. There are times when we apologize to whom we are speaking with, to correct the behavior and ask the child to apologize for interrupting.
Judgment may come when we choose an outfit we used to love and try on now, and it is too sexy, too revealing and it makes us uncomfortable. A movie we may have loved in a time past now offends us and we judge it negatively. A trip to the grocery store may have us judging between two unfamiliar brands when the one we know and prefer is not available
But I am talking about negatively judging matters and then sharing them. I try hard not to share my negative thoughts and opinions. I may not agree, but I do respect your right to your opinion.
However, it is a time of a lot of unrest and judgment from some if the opinions differ, and the differences are leading toward violence and more and more unrest.
We are not to judge. It is written—many times, and repeated by different authors in the Book,
But the answer is easy. Really. At times it feels complicated, but it is easy. God created each of us different. We are all separate individuals with our own thoughts, opinions, history, experiences, values, morals, beliefs and so on. We are striving to do our best, for the most part. I do realize some live to cause unrest and unease, but the majority are good people trying to do the best they can in this life and to live in the manner that avoids trouble.
When harsh thoughts enter my mind, even in this turbulent time, I am easily able to remind myself that God has this, He is in charge and all will come about in the manner He wants. We all have choices to make, to live in the manner He wants of us, but He is in charge. And because of my confidence, I am not feeling fearful with all of this. Yes, I am avoiding crowds, but I am not avoiding people or opportunities that put me near a smaller group.
But there is judgment all around. Even Nathaniel, before he met Jesus, was judgmental, “Can anything good come from Nazareth?” He was already facing this opportunity with a preformed judgment. The same is true of the Samaritans. The Israelites had intermingled and intermarried with this people, yet many people held the Samaritans in poor regard. Yet, Jesus went and purposefully went to Samaria to meet up with the woman at the well. Yes, we know that Jesus loved people, and although He knew their sins, He encouraged them to sin no more. He didn’t pronounce judgment.
And speaking of the Samaritans, I always find it fascinating that we have the woman at the well, as well as the Good Samaritan, a male traveler found an injured man on the side of the road and he stopped and offered aid, carrying him to an inn, paying the innkeeper for the man’s care with the promise that if more was needed for the man’s care, he would return to cover the bill. Yet, this Samaritan, this negatively judged man, from a village that was scorned, stopped and gave aid while a Levite and a priest both purposely crossed the road to avoid the injured man. That is on my list of questions to ask once I reach heaven. Why are there two stories in the New Testament regarding Samaritans? Because they were a large group of people automatically judged negatively by society and You wanted to show You loved all anyway? Or to demonstrate that all (even Samaritans) have a capacity to demonstrate Your love and care for others? That You see into all men/women’s hearts?
We are not supposed to judge others. And it is clear that by the same measure we use to pass judgment on others, that is how we will be judged. I know I can be harsh, and I do not want someone as harsh as myself to be my judge. We need to be careful in judging.
There are some areas we need to judge and take care of—again our children’s or grandchildren’s misbehavior, lovingly confronting someone within the church who is not living within God’s will. We cannot judge them, but we can lovingly help them realize they might be engaging in something that will displease God.
But judgment is easy to slide into. One has to be on guard against the slide. Yet like now, that can be difficult. We hear others speaking judgments all around us, and can easily slip into the conversation and spew our judgment, opinion.
We must guard our thoughts and judgments. Lord, I ask that You always remind me to not judge others, to hold my judgments and to keep negative thoughts to myself. Let me share in a kindly manner toward all for me and ‘mybellaviews.’
Psalm 28:7 The Lord is my strength and my shield; my heart trusted in Him, and I am helped; therefore my heart greatly rejoices, and with my song I will praise Him.
Proverbs 29:25 Fear of man will prove to be a snare, but whoever trusts in the Lord is kept safe.
Isaiah 41:10 Fear not, for I am with you; be not dismayed, for I am your God. I will strengthen you, yes, I will help you, I will uphold you with My righteous right hand.
Isaiah 43:2 When you pass through the waters, I will be with you’ and when you pass through the rivers, they will not sweep over you. When you walk through the fire, you will not be burned; the flames will not set you ablaze.
Sitting here now when so much of the drama of my life has passed, I know I have been so blessed throughout. I can honestly say there has been little that has been awful. Yes, certainly times that seemed a bit stressful. (Haha, thus the benefit of time passing, and memory fading!) There was a period when my fears controlled much of my behavior and actions. That fear could turn to angst, anger and mild depression, and sometimes a complete meltdown and crying jag….(would this time ever end?)
So often, and this was certainly true for me going through this period, I thought it would never end. The stress seemed dreadful and sometimes felt overwhelming and continuous at the time. Now, it’s easy to see how narrow my eyesight was. Bottom line is I allowed lies, threats, stories, intimidation, and my love and fear for others to be used and to control my behavior. Now I can certainly recognize there was little I was doing in a calm and sensible manner.
Stress, fear, anxiety, and therefore impatience and suspicion were frequent visitors, well actually probably took up residence, and not just visiting. That was the worst period of my life, and as I now look back, I was blessed to have a bunch of persons who loved me, and encouraged me and helped me get through it. And as life does, other circumstances come in and the story line changes. Thankfully my story line changed and became a better one.
Hindsight is a wonderful thing. It enables one to see clearly instead of that narrow focus of time. It can kind of be like looking at portions of a patchwork quilt; different parts of the quilt may show different scenes, but as you stand away, you are able to see the kaleidoscope of scenes. I can see many persons in my life who helped, loved, directed, sheltered, and encouraged, and even with the few areas of dark clouds, there were light people (directed by God) to assist my stubborn independence, and to keep me safe.
It’s almost too bad we couldn’t get glimpses of our quilt as we are going through the time. A flash so we could envision a change to this time period. But by seeing the nearly finished quilt, then we are not trusting and committing to God. And that is what He wants. He wants us to trust Him, to be confident in His direction and commands, to turn all over to Him.
But no, I, at least held tightly to being in control, making decisions, steering my life and choices, and maintaining anxiety and stress. Now it seems as though my ‘controlling’ life, served only to feed the beasts of angst and fear. Always, I looked for danger (which was more imagined than actual) and fretted and worried.
It was during this time, I became closer to God. That does not mean I trusted, but I tested that relationship. I had “tentatively” accepted Jesus after hearing Judges 6:10-40, which is about Gideon being told to lead the Israelites to defeat the Midianites. (Gideon did just as I have done often, “Who? Me? Are you looking at me?”)
Why did he tightly hold on to low self-esteem and doubt, when God said he could do this? Why when God told him, he was the one chosen for the task? Probably for the same reasons I did and many others throughout time do. For whatever reasons, we cling to those doubts we have heard from others, we have told ourselves, or we have witnessed others with admirable abilities and then doubt our own. Anyway, Gideon doubted, yet God was persistent.
But my favorite verses, the ones that changed my life, were verses Judges 6:36-40. “Please, God, I am not sure I’ve got this straight. If this is what You are REALLY saying, then allow this to happen….” For two nights Gideon asked God to show him if he truly understood by getting his fleece wet, or having it be dry. I termed it “my fleeces,” and all my friends and family knew I used them whenever I was unsure as to what God was charging me to do.
But I tested and teased rather than allowing myself full and lasting, deep trust. “You know it’s raining, please can I get a parking space close to the door?” And one would open. But that is not believing God is going to help you with the big stuff, that is not stepping forward clothed in your armor for Him. That’s almost playing games, and getting what you asked for, then chuckling and giving thanks, but it’s not deeply sincere. And that’s where I needed to be.
Then I heard a couple sermons close together about testing God. And I realized that constantly using these fleeces was not allowing me to move forward, to get more involved and invested with God. I was still testing God and not fully being with Him, and looking to be of service in His kingdom. It was still all about me. I was still controlling my destiny. I was not bringing the big stuff to God. I had not fully acquiesced my life and the life of my son to Him.
The two sermons opened my heart for more, although still with trepidation. ‘He might ask more of me than what is here. He might not know how fallible and messed up I am? So still, although I was bolder, I wanted to hang on to something secure.’
But I knew He wanted more. So I turned over the rest, the amount I had held back. And what a wonderful journey it has been since.
He has designed my quilt in lovely patterns and through the occasional periods of gray (it was never as dark as my mind and Satan’s lies told me it was) it is easy to see He was always there.
Thank You for softly urging me to come, come all the way, let go of whatever I was holding back from You. I am so thankful for all You have shown and done for me and ‘mybellaviews.’
Psalm 34:14 Depart from evil and do good; seek, inquire for, and crave peace and pursue it.
Isaiah 43:1 Don’t fear, for I have redeemed you; I have called you by name; you are Mine.”
John 14:27 Peace I leave with you; my peace I give you. I do not give to you as the world gives. Do not let your hearts be troubled and do not be afraid.
Matthew 6:34 Therefore do not worry about tomorrow, for tomorrow will worry about itself. Each day has enough trouble of its own.
How do you feel about change? I have usually not been a big fan of change. But, that is life, and we all deal with changes throughout life. My earliest memory of seeing changes was to realize my younger brother had some more leniency and less rules than I did. At first, I resented it, but then it was explained that girls can face dangers that boys don’t face as much. (Such was the thinking in the 1960’s by many parents raising their children.) It seemed females could be more easily taken advantage of, but the truth came out a few decades later that boys were just as vulnerable as girls.
But the point is really not about differences between how children are raised. We have been living with a huge change for the past several months. COVID has caused us to restrict movement; there was no spontaneously running to shop, to meet friends for lunch, to volunteer, many were not able to go to work and started the learning curve of how to do their job from home. We were not living carefree as we had been. Children had to learn how to attend school from home, not being with classmates and friends, suddenly not being allowed to play with their sport teams. Many persons were laid off and comfortable folks were now suddenly fearful of bills, had to figure out new childcare options if they could go to work, and had to find time to add helping more with online schooling to their lists of duties.
For a few moments, we thought the fear and anxieties and learning about the illness would be the headlines for a short time. It’s now moving into the sixth month in short order. So we are now wondering about the new “normal.”
I have just finished reading a couple of books that deal with this thought, although for slightly different reasons. The first was a book called A Woman’s Place by Lynn Austin which covered how the Second World War changed America and many women who had primarily been housewives and mothers, working within their homes, we suddenly working in factories and on production lines. (Prior to this war there were few women working outside except nurses, teachers and librarians). Suddenly, with the onset of America entering the war, women moved into the factory world and industry jobs. The country thought they were facing change for just a short time, just until the end of the war. They thought things would revert to ‘before’ when the boys came home from war. That did not happen.
The second book was also by Lynn Austin and entitled All Things New. This story started at the end of the Civil War, set in North or South Carolina and the former wealthy plantation and slave owners had to return to their homes and thought they would be rebuilding things as they had been. But the slaves were freed, and although an adjustment for both sides to learn, the change was permanent. And one comment by one of the women who had resisted so many of the changes, was “I guess we need to find the new normal, then.”
She was feeling as though the black family who lived and planted crops on her former land were still to be bossed about by her; she’d known them as her slaves, and some remained on her property after the war ended. Her expectation was that nothing had changed. It took a while before she could comprehend that they could leave if she were nasty and disrespectful enough.
She knew nothing about them other than their names. And to their credit, one family stayed and they did obey her commands and demands, but it was slowly coming apparent that things were NOT going to return to life as it had been. Black children were being educated, they were being sent to schools, and were learning the new freedoms available.
Changes were coming to them all. Not with welcome, not with pleasure for all, but still coming. This southern woman did not want, could not envision the changes initially. But she had to learn to adapt, to change, and if the home was to return to any success, she had to make changes to accomplish it.
We all have to face changes. Some are welcome and exciting—a wedding, a pregnancy, a new job, new home. Changes come with unexpected problems—war, hurricanes, illness, job loss, and a myriad of other reasons which can be devastating. Some are individual to a few persons of a family or community. Some are country or even worldwide. But change comes to us all.
COVID has certainly wrought change. At this point we do not know the changes that may be permanent with the COVID virus and the impact of loss, aloneness, and fear that it has aroused. Will children be able to return to school and the “norms” they do as their school day? Will they be able to return to organized sports through school and community? How about debate team? Science club? Book club?
Will professional basketball be forever played in a dome, a segregated dome, that does not allow the players out and so forth, and no audience? How do you help instill the excitement and approval of an audience cheering and supporting your fantastic athletic endeavor without those live fans?
I cannot imagine Fenway Park or Wrigley Field with no fans. There is a distinct personality to Fenway, and I have a lot of memories from there, and just cannot imagine how the plays can be made without fans trying to catch an errant foul or seeing it slide past Pesky’s pole. The fans are needed by the players, and it is a thrill to see them live and in action.
For now we cannot imagine what might be lasting differences after this pandemic.
People have lost their small businesses, some have been in the neighborhoods for a long time, but just cannot afford the long term closures, families wondering what to do about childcare since schools will be operating at strange and different times, some can work from home, yet many cannot. Medical personal need to be in the OR– to hand off the instruments the surgeon needs; to make the calls to the blood bank to send more blood; to call the lab and say they need a rush on the tissue sample; and a myriad of other duties. Surgery is definitely not a solitary act.
Police and firemen and EMTs need to be at work to spring into action in case of an emergency with your family or mine….but what about the fact this is the day their children cannot be at school and there is no place to bring them. Who can watch them? Are we suddenly going to say it’s okay to leave a 4 and 6 year old alone so parents can go to work?
No, no, and NO. I don’t know the answers. I do know that I am comfortable because God has this, He is in control, and I will be fine. My grandchildren are also old enough to be alone for some hours while their parents work. But many, many others do not have teen and preteen children able to handle some of the alone hours and be responsible enough to get online schooling and such done.
Many need the structure and maybe the frequent correction to keep their mind on studies and what the task at hand is. Often a brief pat on the shoulder for a job well done means so much and boosts self- esteem when a child gets that from a teacher.
We are living and seeing a lot of anger, tension and commotion in this country. And I must say I am ashamed so many young are seeing the violence and intolerance of one for another; seeing the ease with people destroying businesses and so forth. I don’t want my grandchildren to think this is normal, this is an okay way to behave. It is NOT.
But this is another big change that this country is facing, with a myriad of tentacles to it—riots, politics, unrest, anger, and commotion.
We know God has this. We know it will work out for our good. But there are so many who do not know that, and more sadly do not know Him. I am praying that the loud proclamations of unrest and death will cease. I believe it breeds more and more. We need to turn, as a country, to God and ask Him to give us rest. But He has every right to be angry and hurt and disappointed in us. And fair as He is, forgiving as He is, He also needs His people to repent, to honor and to follow Him.
I am standing for Him, praising and thankful for all He has done for me and ‘mybellaviews.’
Galatians 6:4 But let each one test his own work, and then his reason to boast will be in himself alone and not in his neighbor.
Philippians 2:3 Do nothing from rivalry or conceit, but in humility count others more significant than yourselves.
James 1:17 Every good gift and every perfect gift comes down from the Father of lights with whom there is no variation or shadow due to change.
Luke 1:37 For nothing will be impossible with God.
Gideon ….. I am the smallest and the weakest Judges 6:15
Moses…. I don’t know what to say, can’t speak clearly Exodus 4:10-31, 6:30
Peter….. I will never deny you, then ran…… Matthew 26:31-35, Luke 22:31-38, John 13:37-38
Many of us contend with the failure thoughts of, “I can’t, don’t know how to” syndrome. Syndromes generally have a few different symptoms. In this case symptoms consist of insecurity, doubt, being unaware of strengths, fear of failure or being judged by others, believing your skills are not as good as someone you have compared yourself with, laziness, selfishness, and of course the list has many more items on it. Gideon was from the lowest clan and he was the youngest in his household, therefore God must be mistaken. Certainly, Gideon was not a leader and he could not lead Israel into war and succeed. ‘I am the youngest, and from the weakest clan. You did hear this, God, right? You do know this. I don’t have any military background. How can I compared to…?’
Moses felt he was not a clear speaker. Initially, he argued with God because of his inability to speak well. Was he a stutterer? Was he shy dealing with others? Did he doubt his abilities? I think he probably did di stutter, stumbled over words, phrases, and sometimes, especially if nervous, took a long time to present his meaning cohesively and coherently. After all, he’d spent much of his adult life out in the desert. I think he certainly doubted his speaking abilities; he was self- conscious of his “lack,” real or unreal, and as we all know, that can make us worse at whatever we believe we are not good enough doing.
God then appointed Aaron to help his brother, Moses. I always thought it a little odd that Aaron and Miriam re-connected with Moses since he was raised in Pharaoh’s home. (Were they allowed to visit as children? How did they keep in contact when Moses disappeared after killing an Egyptian? He was supposed to be out in the desert. (That’s on my list of questions to ask when I get Home.)
But nonetheless, they reconnected and Moses was chosen by God to lead his people from Egypt into the Promised Land. God delegated Aaron to be the voice, the one who spoke God’s commands and if disobedience were to follow, the consequences of not obeying God’s commands.
We all know Pharaoh had a very hardened heart, and continually agreed and then would not follow through on the orders, sinning, and causing a lot of misery in Egypt. (Don’t you wonder how long this occurred? I think if this occurred over a short time, one thing happening almost before there could be recovery, before another calamity, I believe I might have begged to run with the Jewish people.)
Peter, too, had his fears and insecurities. He declared his love for his Lord, was hurt that Jesus questioned him three times as to his love, and with each Jesus gave him a command to care for His sheep, people. But when confronted with the violence of Jesus’ arrest, and trying to find out how the “trial” was going, Peter denied he even knew Jesus, let alone had shared quarters with him and the others for several months.
Each of these doubted their own abilities, strengths, and selves. But it was God who was with and leading them. God only wants us to trust in Him. He is the strength, the one who enables us to use our gifts and to be serving Him as He directs our path. But we tend to think of me, my abilities, I am unfit, unable, unskilled, and forget, at least for a while, God directs, guides, leads, and equips for any task, to any person He wants, to do a specific task.
Certainly, I am ‘comparison’ person. I admire others for skills, humor, abilities, easy-going manner, and a myriad of other talents and attributes, and I used to think, ‘I would love to have that…’ Over time, reading God’s word, listening to bible teachings, fellowship gatherings, and just growing in Him, I know that is not what God wants me to do. He has given me my own skill set, and He will enable me to carry out the tasks He directs for me with what I have, or will supply me with what I need for His walk.
So, know you walk in good company even if you doubt, think you are not enough. You have the same thoughts that Gideon, Moses and Peter had, and they all excelled.
I am grateful for the skills You have given for me and ‘mybellaviews.’
John 21:21,22 Peter, seeing him, said to Jesus, “But Lord, what about this man?” (22) Jesus said to him, “If I will that he remain tell I come, what is that to you? You follow Me.”
1 Thessalonians 4:11,12 that you also aspire to lead a quiet life, to mind your own business, and to work with your own hands, as we commanded you, that you may walk properly toward those who are outside, and that you may lack nothing.
Romans 14:12 So then each of us will give an account of himself to God
Galatians6:4 But let each one test his own work, and then his reason to boast will be in himself alone and not in his brother.
As many of you know, I enjoy gardening. I’m not all that knowledgeable, and truly I mostly see a plant that I like—pretty color or blossoms, thrives good in my area, or something—and with usually no research, I buy, usually two since I want symmetry, and dig a hole, add some gardening soil or dirt from my compost bin, and plop it in and hope it grows. I usually water after, but if weather forecast predicts rain, I won’t. So truly I am not a diligent caretaker of His plants. But I love the blossoms, the colors, the different blooming times, and the fact that it looks like I did something artistic, but it is not my artistry at all. I shop, I find something I like, hope I have a place for it, then come home and wonder if it will look good here…or maybe right here….hmmm, already too crowded. Should we go closer to the road, or does it need a bit more protection so maybe down by the fencing? OK, decision made, find the spade, dig, add good dirt since I am always doubtful the plants will thrive in the sand at the beach; then I say a prayer, plop it in, straighten it out if it looks a tad off kilter, and fill in the hole, adding more good dirt around the top. Say a prayer, and thank Him for the health I have to work it, and for the “harvest” and that’s it.
Because most of the stuff in my garden has been there since we did this design in June of 2008, it is established. It has adapted to hot, dry summer winds, it has made do with the freezing ocean temps and salt spray, as well as my clumsiness. I do week when I see unwanted things popping up—dollar weeds, stringy grass, some fine clover, and wide leaf weeds such as dandelion and so forth. It used to require frequent nurturing, it no longer does. I might have to get out there once monthly. Maybe we have “trained” the weeds and they recognize they are unwanted, so then don’t show, or maybe we have so much planted between my neighbor and myself, the weeds “know” they will die with a rude yank and toss.
I no longer have to work hours at a time weeding and culling and making things better. But God is still weeding, culling things with me, and making me better. Unlike my limited knowledge, He knows precisely how to cut, pull, trim, and remove. And I am so grateful. I might very well be apt to whine and complain as the process is going on, “Is it truly that bad? What about You -know -who? But-but..” He reminds me that my concern should only be for myself and not to worry how He is handling others. Oh yeah, I read that in John 21:21, 22…..none of my business; I have to be concerned just for me. It is just me who faces Jesus on Judgment Day, not so and so.
I probably sigh dramatically, much as I did in high school, and admit I need a good trimming and go forth. Usually, I change my tune once I realize I have the Master Gardener at work. Whether I am ready or not, here it comes. One of the things I did learn dealing with those difficult teen years, if I complained about the discipline, it lasted longer. If I went in my room, was well behaved, with no WHINING, the sentence of being grounded was lifted sooner. It was extended the more I complained and argued.
I certainly don’t know if I look better once the weeds are yanked, and the plants are trimmed and fertilized and nurtured, but I know some of the many faults and sinful things attached to my nature have been dealt with, and I present better. Certainly, I look better to the Master Gardener, and that’s the best way my garden can look.
I am so glad the Gardener knows exactly how to weed me and ‘mybellaviews.’
Hi, I'm Kathy. Welcome to my website!