1 Corinthians 10:13 The temptations in your life are no different from what others experience. And God is faithful. He will not allow the temptation to be more than you can stand. When you are tempted, he will show you a way out so that you can endure.
Matthew 26:41 “Watch and pray so that you will not fall into temptation. the spirit is willing, but the flesh is weak.”
James 1:12 Blessed is the man who endures temptation: for when he has been approved, he will receive the crown of life which the Lord has promised to those who love Him.
Do you have any temptations you wrestle with on a fairly frequent basis? For years I had a battle with cigarettes. I was an ICU nurse, cared for many, MANY people who suffered and fought with COPD (chronic obstructive pulmonary disease), lung cancer and they would be omitted then almost cut in two to remove a lung which had a malignancy/cancerous tumor. They would be intubated (a breathing tube inserted into the mouth going all the way to the top of the lungs, and a machine would force oxygenated air into the lungs. These folks could rest fairly easy if not disturbed. Of course, they were always sedated, but each shift would lighten the sedation for a few minutes and have the person follow certain commands–squeezing hands, nodding of shaking the head, to ensure that nothing unseen had happened such as suffering a stroke or something.
But as the sedation lessened, the awareness of this huge discomfort in the throat increased, and the person would cough, gag, struggle to remove this vital equipment, and be held down forceably until we could get re-sedated.It was not a pleasant experience and yet it was necessary to make sure we could arouse them so that when the injury/illness/or secretions lessened, we could get them well enough to have the tube removed.
My point in relating this to you, is that during much of the years I worked as an ICU nurse and witnessed the results of damage done by tobacco, I was smoking. To me now, several years away from those murderous, yet alluring sticks (talk about your money going up in smoke?!), I wonder how I could ever have been caught in the web of cigarette smoking for YEARS. I saw the damage day in and day out. I matched Scarlett O’Hara for saying, “Fiddle dee-dee. I’ll worry about this tomorrow!”
I FINALLY picked a date, actually dedicated to Jesus as it was Christmas Day, and chose that as my end date. (Actually it had to be December 24, just before bed, then I went up, did the nightly routine, and vowed I was doing this for Him. I won’t say one of my first thoughts Christmas morning wasn’t about cigarettes, but I firmly reminded Satan to leave me alone, and myself that I had the Holy Spirit and this was doable. I did have nicotine patches which I wore for a month, slowly reducing the nicotine. One of the worst symptoms of giving up nicotine is fierce anxiety and grumpiness, so I felt it was a necessary precaution to save anyone around me from danger I might hand out!!
So although I offered it as a gift of sacrifice since these nasty things were such a draw for me, Christ made it easy for me to give them up. And I have not had an inclination for one since.
I am so thankful I turned this temptation to Him…me and “mybellaviews” are healed from that vice.
Psalm 36:5 For You, Lord, are good and ready to forgive, and abundant in mercy to all those who call upon You.
Ephesians 4:31.32 Let all bitterness, wrath, anger, clamor, and evil speaking be put away from you with all malice. And be kind to one another, tenderhearted, forgiving one another, even as God in Christ forgave you.
Matthew 18:21,22 Then Peter came to Him and said, “Lord, how often shall my brother sin against me, and I forgive him? Up to seven times? Jesus said to him, “I do not say to you, up to seven times, but up to seventy times seven.”
We all have conflicts from time to time throughout our lives.
We have disagreement, differences of opinions, differences in the way to do things, maybe how to raise your pet, children, interact with siblings, etc. God created us all with a unique imprint.
Yes, there are many aspects our uniqueness differs from anyone else. We have separate, although sometimes the same circumstances yet, our perception and response probably will differ even from other people who lived the same event as you, perhaps even a family member has a bit of a different memory or perception. Circumstances, life events, age, listening to others opinions, observing good or bad behavior in others and so forth all blend together to form part of who we are and how our minds work and come to the conclusions they do. My ideas and opinions may vary from yours, may contrast greatly with some, and are totally different from many others. Those differences do not mean I am wrong and you are right or vice versa. They are just differences. And we are each entitled to our opinions.
Arguments, nasty words, rudeness, and other bad behaviors can hurt us and have a lasting effect. It has been difficult over the years, for me to not take offense at some things that were said or done. My spouse had a Don Rickles type of humor and I would frequently have my feelings hurt. Most people thought he was funny with his comments—which were NOT all directed at me—he shared his sarcastic wit with almost everyone, but frequently my feelings were hurt.
We all get hurt about different things which happen, and I have found that if I examine some things which were said or done, I might be able to twist it around and make myself be offended. But that is not what I should do. I should try to see the best in what others say and do, and if I have a true reason to be alerted that something is not right, it is better to go and address my concerns, rather than assuming the worst. Mistakes can often be interpreted when not questioned; and ill feelings develop with no true reason.
It’s wonderful having everyone be unique. No one else has all your qualities, background, experiences and so on which has partially formed who you are.
We are bound to hurt others, albeit without meaning to and to have our own feelings hurt sometimes. I feel it is better to truly examine a circumstance and see if there was an intent to hurt. And the Holy Spirit is with us to help direct our paths and warn us if someone is trying to intentionally hurt us. There is usually a motive if someone is trying to hurt–jealously, anger, arrogance, lies, etc.
Experiences and past events may make one oversensitive and feel insulted, slighted or whatever, when that is not the intent, but it might be the perception. I am finding it easier to evaluate motives to see if I should feel slighted. And could it be my mis-perception. Perhaps I have misinterpreted something said or done. I am trying to always give someone the benefit of the doubt when feeling a little stung. Generally, the error is mine. It was my misreading of something said or done.
And there are times the person who hurt us, had no intention of causing hurt, and may be totally unaware of causing bad feelings. Yet the person who felt hurt has anger, un-forgiveness, a bitterness in their heart. Examine the circumstance with all honesty. Do you believe there was an intent to hurt? Could you have misread the situation because of other things you had going on? Could that person have other stresses happening and been in a hurry so seemed abrupt and was not truly hurtful? Before you accept hurt, you must believe an intent to hurt was there. Be honest, not judgmental. Don’t look for assumed faults and hurts. There is enough damage done by many with intention,so if someone has hurt unintentionally, be quick to forgive, and if they are undergoing a trying time, offer to help.
It is sometimes very difficult to forgive. Forgiveness is a big step, but a necessary step for you, your stress and health. And it is very important for your soul.
I cannot imagine being Stephen and being stoned because he believed Jesus was the Messiah, was crucified, died and then rose. Stephen knew the truth, spoke the truth, and he suffered a painful death being repetitively hit with stones until the damage was so severe, he died. Personally, I hope he was hit in the head with the first couple of stones and was unconscious throughout most of the stoning. But he cried out to God to forgive his accusers and abusers. (Acts 7:60) That is forgiveness.
Jesus also cried out as one of His final seven statements asking His Father to forgive those who had beaten, crucified Him. (Matthew 27:46). That is incredible grace. It is also the knowledge that we, too, are undeserving and since we are forgiven, we must offer forgiveness to others who have hurt us.
Most of us witnessed a wonderful display of forgiveness when Brandt Jean asked if he could hug in forgiveness the woman who had killed his brother Botham Jean. He hugged her for several moments and told her he forgave her for taking his brother’s life.
You take the time to pray and ask for strength and then you forgive the other at least in your mind. Maybe your heart is not there yet, but you ask God for help in getting the forgiveness to fully bloom, and it does. It is not easy, and certainly Satan wants us to hold onto the bitterness, the anger, the hurt, the pain and the grief. But that’s not healthy and it’s not grace, and as those who love Jesus, it is not the way He wants us to live. .
Not easy, But knowing we are forgiven sins without being deserving, we can forgive. Ask God to take your anger, ease your grief and give you solace. His Word promises He will.
It’s always been a growing process walking with Jesus for “mybellaviews.”
1 Corinthians 6:19-20 Or do you not know that your body is the temple of the Holy Spirit who is in you, whom you have from God and you are not your own? For you were bought at a price: therefore glorify God in your body and in your spirit, which are God’s.
Proverbs 21:21 Whoever pursues righteousness and kindness will find life, righteousness and honor.
Ephesians 4:31.32 Get rid of all bitterness, rage and anger, brawling and slander, along with every form of malice. Be kind and compassionate to one another, forgiving each other, just as in Christ God forgave you.
So often I hear from my friends and relatives who are not actively seeking God, that they think there is always time later to accept God’s invitation. Or they fear they might have to give up and sacrifice a lot, and would rather keep their lives status quo. And still others do not believe Jesus was God, but just a wonderful prophet, and although was killed on a cross, he was not the Son of God, only a good man. So therefore, He did not die to free us from sin, to enable us to get to heaven and have an eternity there.
They see life as good, things are going well for them, and they see no need to seek God. They certainly can’t see how their lives would improve and many fear there would be way too much sacrifice; things, fun times, and would have to curb language, having a drink when going out, etc. Some have no belief there is anything after this life. No heaven, no hell…nothing.
They also sometimes do not see a loving, nonjudgmental heart in some who proclaim to be a Christian and love God. Instead they see a negative, judgmental, gossip or crass speaking person. And that’s a shame. Christ always showed kindness We are not, and never will be perfect, but we should strive for kindness, gentleness, and love toward others, as well as humility. People should be able to see that within us. It ought to be one of the first things we should strive toward is kindness and simple pleasantness to all.
Christians should work toward being better. It means not abusing alcohol, food, drugs, and other products that can harm you or another. Because when we accept Jesus as savior and lord over us, we are also accepting the presence of the Holy Spirit residing in us, and are therefore denigrating God’s dwelling place by treating ourselves negatively. We can abuse ourselves with drugs, alcohol, overeating, abusing sugar, and so many other ways, including trying to harm ourselves physically. We are on a journey to learn to love, not just others, but OURSELVES.
We have a responsibility to strive to improve. We believe Jesus Himself came to this earth, giving up His place of honor in heaven, to walk among us, tolerating our selfish ways, teaching and showing grace and forgiving sins, demonstrating the kind, patient and loving way to live. Then He AGREED to offer Himself in full atonement for OUR sins. He was sinless. It required a sacrifice to get right with God after sinning.
But we are not perfect, only human. We needed a Savior, a final sacrifice to free us from the laws of the Old Testament, so we could have a way to attain heaven upon death. We were then able to have a relationship with God, through His Son, Jesus. But it also becomes part of one’s desire. Once we accept Jesus as Lord of our lives, there’s an inner urge to become better in all aspects of our lives. We cannot do this alone, but when we are aware of doing something that would grieve God, we don’t want to do it any longer. It is not easy to resist certain behaviors sometimes, but it gets easier asking the Holy Spirit for help; and suddenly things you may have craved or enjoyed are removed and resisting gets easier. Things that were acceptable at one time in my life (an example: daytime soaps) are just no longer acceptable to me.
Sometimes I change without seeking the change, again the soaps, but other times, there is a struggle. Cigarettes were a struggle for me for years. But with God’s help they are no longer a part of my life and I have no desire for them to be in it ever.
Another area is my mouth. I sometimes hear trash coming from it—cursing, gossip, or being judgmental. When I hear it and catch it, I apologize and ask God to help me AGAIN. This behavior is NOT acceptable or honoring Him and I do not want to do it. But I do sometimes. Hopefully less than I used to, but I caught myself the other day being judgmental, gossipy and cursing in one brief time with a neighbor. Shame! That is NOT who and what I want to be.
But I don’t find I have to give up anything I don’t want in my life. It seems it’s just a natural growth and walk with Him; many negative things fall away. No struggle, no desire to hold things, but growth, and I must admit a smoother path in life. It feels good to see some things I enjoyed over the years, gone. If something does not meet my standards, it’s eliminated. I don’t want to be near something that makes me uncomfortable…even though a few years ago, it was acceptable. I certainly feel I have gained knowing Jesus as my Lord and Savior. I have not released anything that was not good for me, and have gained a positive perspective, a peace, a knowing, a belief that I will have eternal life with Jesus and many others when my earthly life ends. What a wonderful peace and reassurance.
I’m enjoying the journey. I still have many areas I would like to see improve, but I know it is a life walk and path; not just an acceptance of Him and then no sin. But life is less chaotic and I see His blessings all the time.
Thank You for accepting me and “mybellaviews.”
Therefore, I say to you, do not worry about your life, what you will eat or what you will drink, nor about your body, what you will put on. Is not life more than food and the body more than clothing? Look at the birds of the air, for they neither sow nor reap nor gather into barns, yet your heavenly Father feeds them. Are you not of more value than they? Which of you by worrying can add one cubit to his stature? Matthew 6:25-27
Anxiety in the heart of man causes depression, but a good word makes it glad. Proverbs 12:25
How can we end worry? It is so debilitating. Heavy, Endless–Ugh.
“No way around it. Step right up and join with us in complaining. Life just stinks. It is nothing but headaches, heartaches, and troubles. No way around it. This is life” Satan whispers, yells, and reminds of this daily, sometimes many times in one day. UGH! Enough. How can I be freed from this?
For those who do not yet know Jesus as Lord and Savior, these are the lies and beliefs many have.
I found immense freedom when I gave God control. Do I slide sometimes, thinking I have control…yes, but it is RARE now, very rare. It is SO much harder for the king of lies to puncture my armor of God and the Holy Spirit.
I think it’s human nature to worry at times. Some people worry all the time, and never seem to have a worry-free moment. Others are fairly laid back and try to take each day as it comes, and rarely seem to worry. But worry does come to each of us and we each handle it differently. We are all individuals, meaning we each look at things slightly different than others. And therefore handle everything, including worries differently.
Some of us have strengths where others have weakness and vice versa. But God’s word encourages, actually tells us to give Him our worries and concerns, and to not spend and expend our energy on worrying. We have little to no control over events in our lives. We may think we do, but then are shocked when severe sudden accidents, LIFE happens. We have little control; and yet think we are in command. . . . . until we are scooped up into a problem or unanticipated event.
It took me a long time to relinquish my worries. I wonder now if I liked keeping them close. But it was more a matter believing I, myself, me, was in control. How silly, how cocky. I have finally learned I have little control. Yes, I can pay my bills on time, can check in with family and friends and make sure they are all doing well (and can say prayers if there are issues), I can drive to the store and choose my merchandise, etc. But I have little control in the grand realm.
It behooves me to greet God each morning, ask Him to protect my family and keep them healthy, and to guide my steps, use me if there is a need I can accomplish for His kingdom.
I have learned over years how much easier my life is by handling over worries to God: again, not always easy, at least in those first days of trust and believing. Those worries would leap back into my mind and I would again start gnawing on them, then remember I had handed it off to God. . . and I needed to let Him deal, to trust Him. And remind myself to relinquish once again the worry I tried to snatch back.
for those who may read these blogs regularly, you may recognize this poem, as I recently wrote it but it was also one of my mental reminders each time I back slid and tried to snatch my worry and control back.
Broken Dreams
As children bring their toys with tears for us to mend, I brought my broken dreams to God because He was my Friend.
But then instead of leaving Him in peace to work alone, I hung around and tried to help with ways that were my own.
At last I snatched them back and cried, “How could You be so slow?”–“My child,” He said, “What could I do? You never did let go.”
It was easy for this poem to jump in my head when I tried to snatch something back after asking for His help and then sliding right on back to impatience and worry. That doesn’t happen much any longer. Thanks to the Holy Spirit reminding me life goes much smoother letting God be in charge. He knows what needs to e done for my life and His kingdom.
Wahoo, life is so much easier and smoother doing this. So when you’re buried in worries, please turn to any of the verses I’ve written, or find your own. They have certainly made ‘mybellaviews’ much more pleasant and easy.
Matthew 12:37 by your words you will be justified and acquitted and by your words you will be condemned and sentenced.
Psalm 19:14 Let the words of my mouth and the meditation of my heart be acceptable in Your sight, O Lord, my strength and my Redeemer.
Ecclesiastes 12:11 The words of the wise are like goads, and the words of scholars are like well driven nails, given by one Shepherd. (I looked up ‘goads’ since it was an unknown word to me. Goads were sticks the shepherds used to steer and guide the cattle/sheep/oxen they were caring for to keep them on the correct paths.)
Our words can build up or tear down and apart. Often times we may spew something out in a moment of anger, and not realize the damage those moments of gushing words may have caused. We can cause insecurity in others, hurt feelings, insult, defeat a person just as they are trying something new, and/or convince another they have no talent, cause them reason to believe the devil’s lies ‘they’ll always be worth nothing’… and so on. You get the message. A moment’s negative utterance can have lasting and damaging effects for years.
And of course, family members may voice frustration, anger, stress out in a negative moment, and not realize just how much of an impact those words speared into another’s soul. And yes, all included—siblings, parents, grandparents all can impact another’s view of themselves. There are always differences in family members and one may get on another’s nerves and frustration causes nasty thoughts to utter out.
But those same people can give more positive feedback and thereby increase the security, self-esteem, positive outlook and confidence. We all encounter frustrations and say things we should hold back when stressed. I hate it when I hear anything negative coming from my mouth now.
And believe me, I spewed things in fear, anger, frustration, hopelessness and all. I hate that it happened, and hope I have apologized for those times. But does the apology totally remove the awful feelings I may have caused? No, absolutely NOT. Words hurt. It is a total lie “Stick and stones can break my bones, but words will never hurt me.” That’s a complete and utter lie.
But I hope my words and prayers to God asking Him to show me who I harmed, so I can apologize for hateful, hurtful things that I said. I want the opportunity to tell whomever I love them, have good wishes for them, and never meant to cause hurt and damage. If I have missed anyone, I ask God to show me who they are so I can make an apology and explanation for my unkind and hurtful words. I pray God will heal any damage my negative words and behavior caused. And if something is still unresolved that He will encourage them to come to me to hear an explanation as to what was happening in my life to cause this awful behavior. My words of confession are just as important to and for them as they are that I acknowledge to God. And more importantly, God can heal them. I can only apologize and perhaps give an explanation—which does not heal the damage.
For years, I have been praying for God to teach me to tether my impatience so it will grow into the fruit of the Holy Spirit as patience. The fruit develops as one has more and more of an understanding of God, seeks His desires, and yearns to live more like Jesus.
I pray not to become overwhelmed, stressed or fearful as during those times, I have less control over my mouth. I pray my words don’t ebb out into gossip, into judgment, and nothing passes in anger. Thinking before answering another is so important to me now. Never again do I want my words to injure another.
Always I have had a gift for encouragement and praise. Knowing that, I try to always use positive words or acknowledgments to someone so they receive a slight uplifting message. I know how much of a boost a quick positive word can give another.
I pray my words will continue to always be positive to others, to Him and that I can always lift others to Him. Give me words You want me to speak to help others see You, and not a person who says negative thoughts, words, or gossip. Let my words always be for Your glory.
You know I like using words in ‘mybellaviews.’
Hi, I'm Kathy. Welcome to my website!